Now that you’ve have discovered how to identify and overcome your limiting beliefs, you can begin to rebuild your self-confidence by boosting your self-esteem. To do this, you have first to change your self-perception.
You need to change how you look at yourself and how you view yourself. Everybody has self-perception. Everyone has a mental picture in their minds of who they are, what they are capable of, and where they are going.
If you suffer from low self-confidence, you have a negative view of these things. You probably feel that you are not worth much of anything and that whatever you try will result in mediocrity or failure.
You have to work on your self-perception if you want to increase your self-esteem and build your self-confidence. To start the process of improving your self-esteem, you need to incorporate these daily habits into your life.
Change Your Self-Talk
Self-talk is merely the act of talking to yourself, either mentally or aloud. It is any thought that pops into your head in reaction to external stimuli. The way that you feel about situations depends on what you tell yourself.
If you think about the situation negatively, it will lead to negative emotions like irritation or anxiety. Thinking about the situation positively will lead to positive feelings like excitement or happiness.
When you are working on increasing your self-esteem, you become more aware of the constant self-talk that leads to negative feelings, and you can replace it with positive self-talk that encourages higher levels of self-esteem.
For example, if you are always telling yourself that you are fat every time you look in the mirror, you need to stop and replace these thoughts with words of encouragement. In this example, you have trained yourself to look at areas of your body that make you insecure and reinforce your insecurity by saying “I’m fat.”
If you teach yourself to look in the mirror and appreciate your body or focus on an area that you feel good about, over time, this will shift your self-image and confidence.
Affirmations are simple, positive statements that you say about yourself to change negative thinking patterns. You can say a set of affirmations every day or use them to replace negative self-talk. Affirmations help to improve self-esteem by implanting new beliefs to replace beliefs that cause low self-esteem.
When you are trying to change your automatic thoughts and negative self-talk, it is helpful to have a set of affirmations to use in place of the old, negative thinking patterns that you have developed. With enough repetition, affirmations will become implanted into your subconscious mind.
You have to recognize you are unique. You also have to realize that you never get the full story and that everyone puts on a front in an attempt to disguise their insecurities.
When you compare yourself to others, you are merely comparing yourself to the façade others are presenting to the world. Everyone has thoughts, doubts, insecurities, judgments and other inner battles that they deal with in their minds.
You also need to stop using comparisons to make yourself feel good about yourself. It is tempting to do in an effort to feed your own ego, but it turns into a vicious cycle.
When you use comparisons to make yourself feel better, your brain will automatically use it to make you feel worse. The only way to escape this is to cut yourself off from making comparisons between yourself and others.
Judgment is one of the most destructive and least productive habits you can develop. Unfortunately, few live a life that is free form judgmental thoughts. Judgment and true confidence are incompatible. One can never experience genuine peace while holding onto judgments.
Judgment becomes habitual in us; we naturally do it without even realizing it. We judge ourselves as a form of punishment for not being perfect, and we judge others in an attempt to make ourselves feel better. People who are truly happy with themselves do not feel the urge to judge others or themselves.
The first step on the path to this kind of freedom is accepting that there is nothing perfect in the universe. You need to learn to take yourself as you are and accept others in the same way. Everyone came into this world with different personalities, have had various experiences that have shaped us and we all continue to face challenges. Judging anyone is unfair.
Neglecting your own needs can contribute to low self-esteem, as well as being a symptom of low self-esteem. Self-care is merely doing something because it makes you happy.
It can be as simple as relaxing in a bubble bath, enjoying a massage, or taking a walk by yourself. Self-care is often looked at as selfishness. People often feel guilty for spending time on themselves because they think that it is taking away the happiness of others.
The first step to change this is to recognize you are worthy of time and attention and release any thoughts that cause guilt. Next, you need to think of one thing that you can add in on a regular basis that is 100 percent for you.
Tell your loved ones that you are doing it and be as committed to yourself as you have been to everyone else.
Let go of Perfectionism
Perfectionism is often a cover-up for insecurity. It is also the number one enemy of confidence. Perfectionism comes from an underlying belief that you must be perfect to deserve love and acceptance from yourself and others.
It indicates that an individual places his or her self-worth on accomplishments and defines his or her self-concept based on actions. This mindset leads to drastic fluctuations in mood and confidence and immense pressure to always get it right.
You need to let go of your perfectionistic tendencies. You have to foster an unconditional love and acceptance for yourself and know you are separate from your actions and accomplishments. The more willing you are to accept yourself when you make mistakes, the higher your self-esteem will become.
Celebrate Daily Victories
It can become overwhelming when we are trying to change any aspect of our lives. Changes take time, and it can only happen with daily actions.
There have been plenty of people who have been able to overcome shyness and develop a healthy self-esteem, but it wasn’t accomplished overnight. To stay motivated on your path to increasing your self-esteem and building your confidence, you have to recognize and celebrate the small victories.
Celebrating small victories when working toward any goal will also help to build your confidence. You deserve credit and have to be willing to give yourself recognition. If you are always focusing on how far away you are from reaching your end goal, your journey may turn into a struggle, filled with doubt and disappointment.
Instead, celebrate the small accomplishments along the journey and become filled with the encouragement and the energy to continue.
Individuals with low self-esteem tend to focus on the negative experiences and lack in their lives. It is easy to focus on what you want but don’t have, and it takes an effort to change this outlook.
Expressing appreciation and gratitude for everything in your life will transform your perspective during each moment and eventually alter your perceptions of yourself and the world.
When practicing gratitude, be thankful for the blessings in your life, and who you are as a person. Take a moment to list three unique things that you appreciate in yourself and three things that you are grateful for in your life. Try to incorporate a practice of gratitude for yourself and the world on a daily basis and see the impact it has on your overall self-esteem.
Set Realistic Expectations
The quickest way to kill your confidence is to set high expectations for yourself. Setting goals and working toward them can help you build your confidence. However, if you set unrealistic standards, you will only end up feeling defeated.
If you have something that you want to work toward, come up with a realistic goal that you can work on today. Keep your goals small and attainable and be sure to celebrate each small victory.